Serving the University of Texas at San Antonio Community Volume 1, Number 10 January 29, 1991
OPERATION PARKING SPACE
ou are a UTSA student and drive to sdwol. Ws early aid you're still sleepy as you pi4 iSo one of the vaikws parking kite on cam¬ pus. As you drive around in search of a park¬ ing space, you realizj the lot is fiiU. De^ra- tioD sets in. A cold chill runs through your body. One thought enters your mind: initiate Opmlion Paridi« Space.
To amid Operation Parking Space you coukl drive a RV to school, park at agood spot and st^r there for the semester. This would work, but the moment you'd ^ve up your spot a park¬ ing vultiire swoop down and consume your precious space.
Sfaice the mobile home solutfon is not feasi¬ ble, you dedde to drive to school and attempt parking. A sure method of finding a parking space is to get to school early. The best hours are between 4.-Q0 and 6:00 a.m., but like most college students you stay up late getting work done and farm hours just don't cut it Anytnne past lunriie means Operatwn Parking Space mult be fanpfemented.
it is advisable to get to UTSA at least one hour before the start of dass. This gives you time to hunt for a space. Make sure your car has a fiill taidc of gas eveiy momin^youll need it.
Now the hunt begins. Drivnig from kit to kit you cant find a space, no matter how hard you tiy. This is «4ien you become a parking vutture. A parkfaig vulture is a desperste studoit who w31 go to any lengths to get a parking space. There is the faitiinidating vulture who sees its. prey — someone leavuig — breathes on its vic- tun's bumper and waits to get the space. The persuasive vulture finds someone heading toward their car and slyly convinces its prey
to wiling refinquish the valuable territory. To be a good vulture, quick thinking and skiMd driving are a must
If hunting d cs not yield you a space then the only thing left to do is park illegally. This is dangerous and shoukl only be tried by the professional parking student as a last ditch ef¬ fort An practical and legal methods shoukl be tried first
In parking illegally the main danger is the dreaded and feared OSS, the Orange Shirt Squad. The OSS are the student parking police and should not be confused with the re^ilar UTSA police who protect the campus.
The job of the oisS is to pursue and tkket illegally parked cars. The OSS are skilUiil at their jobs and avokUng them reflures parking stealth, bi parking illegaUy iaiatfnatkm and self initiative win the day. A car obviously parked iUeeJly wH certainly attract the OSS. Be as in¬ conspicuous a* possible.
The best vnauthorized parking spaces are behind the Convocation Center or in a yellow zebra zone next to a real spot The grass can also serve wd but be carefol of the mud. Usual¬ ly, the OSS will let you park in these areas if Uie kits are fidL Avokl parking on a NO PARK¬ ING curve or ni a FACULTY/STAFF space as
DESPERATION PARiaNQ - late for dass.
Wlisn tlie tots are IM aome studsnts iwiil try snytliing to svoid being
this wiU ceitanily result in a tKket Another sure citation is sneaking into a kit that does not cor¬ respond witii your parking tag. Be carefol, you can be towed away.
The parking problem at UTSA is real. Ifs unfortunate that students have to resort to such extreme tactics to find parking. At the Paisano we do not advocate illegal parking nor do we blame the campus polke who are trying to do their job under difficult circumstances.
It seems that everyone has an opinion about the parking problem. If the UTSA community voKed their concerns to the administration then possibly an answer to the parking woes coukl be found. Until then keep himting or take the bus. ^
by Jose E. Rodriyua: Photogrt^y Editor